


When He Sleeps

by iLibra



Series: The Rich Kid [3]
Category: Metal Gear
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Fluff, M/M, Past Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Suffering from withdrawals, basically Adam caring for his boyfriend
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-22
Updated: 2016-01-22
Packaged: 2018-05-15 13:57:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,533
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5787814
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iLibra/pseuds/iLibra
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kaz decided to quit drinking, but what if the withdrawals are almost too much to bear? Adam will be there, when Kaz needs him the most.</p>
            </blockquote>





	When He Sleeps

Kaz laid awake, staring up at the shadowed ceiling, eyes aching with tiredness and yet he was still unable to fall asleep. He looked over at the blond boy sleeping peacefully beside him, curled up beneath a blanket. It had been just a few weeks since they had started really going out with each other, after their horrible start.

Without warning, Kaz's heart started to beat rapidly, almost painfully in his chest and he curled his hand in the fabric of his shirt, clutching his chest. He didn't want to wake Adam up so he quickly slipped out of the bed and went into the living room. It was starting again.

He was suffering from horrible withdrawals since he had decided to quit drinking. Kaz remembered what had happened a few days ago, when he couldn't stand it anymore and downed a whole bottle of cheap whiskey that he had bought with a face red from shame. As soon as he had finished the bottle he had run to the toilet to try and throw it all up again, but it was too late, the substance was already streaming through his blood circulation. He felt so weak after that and because Adam was consumed with school work at the time, he couldn't just call him over. After he really thought about it, though, he was glad Adam couldn't come over. He didn't want Adam to see him like that, a weak, pathetic mess, hanging over the toilet like that.

And now he was here again, throwing up what was left in his stomach. He barely made it to the bathroom in time and his head was throbbing painfully. He cursed himself when he remembered that he forgot to close the door to his bathroom. He could only hope that Adam wouldn't hear him, because it wasn't easy to stay quiet when your stomach decided to empty itself in the middle of the night. After he was done he stood up, quickly cleaning the bad taste from his mouth. He went to the living room when he could taste nothing but peppermint on his tongue, settling down on the couch, his head in his hands.

The horrible throbbing of his head just wouldn't stop, and his breathing went ragged as he began to shiver uncontrollably. It was bad, it was really bad today. He wished he hadn't brought Adam here tonight, he didn't want Adam to see him like that. He could only hope that he wouldn't wake up now.

He tightened his grip in his hair, pulling on it hard to distract him from the pain, every muscle in his body tensing. He couldn't hold down the distressed sounds that escaped his mouth. He just wanted this to stop right now, but there was nothing that could ease this pain other than a drink. And he didn't want to stop his pain with that, even though his mind was screaming at him to just do it. It was screaming that it would make the shivers stop, that it would calm his rapidly beating heart down, that it would make him feel better. Kaz was trying his best to ignore the voice, still holding his head in his hands.

His whole body shook with a particularly harsh shiver and Kaz couldn't hold back a low, pained scream, pushing a hand over his mouth to stifle his groans. He pressed his eyes shut, trying to calm down, sweat starting to roll down his neck as he still breathed heavily.

"Kaz?" he heard a sleepy voice from the direction of his bedroom. Great, just great, Kaz thought bitterly. He really wanted to suffer his misery alone and not drag Adam into this whole mess, so he sighed and tried to pull himself together. He looked up and saw Adam standing in the door frame, a worried look on his face that was blurred with the dark shadows of the bedroom. Kaz didn't know what to say so he just remained silent, staring at Adam until the shivers started again. He wrapped his arms around his stomach, curling in on himself and suppressing his distressed groans.

Adam walked over to the couch where Kaz was sitting with careful steps. The blond boy stood before him, not sure if he should sit down or not. Kaz was holding his head in his hands again, still breathing heavily.

"What's the matter?" Adam asked him, honest concern in his voice. Kaz just kept carding a hand through his own hair, trying to calm down, trying to make this shaking stop.

"Do you need something?" Adam tried again. _Yes, I need a drink._ is what shot through Kaz's brain and he made a disappointed grunt at that. He didn't want to talk to Adam at the moment, he just wanted to go back to bed, and he wanted the shaking to stop. His head just didn't stop throbbing, Adam's voice booming through his mind. Every word he said sounded like he was speaking through a megaphone.

"Kaz!"

"Shut up, god, damn it!" Kaz snapped at him, yelling way louder than he had intended to. He could see Adam jolt back at that from the corner of his eyes and cursed himself internally. He didn't want to yell at him. "Sorry... Go back to bed, Adam." he continued in a low voice, rubbing his temples with his fingers.

Instead of listening to him Adam put one of his knees on the couch next to Kaz and wrapped his arms gently around his neck, putting his cheek on the top of Kaz's head. Kaz was still having troubles getting his breathing under control, but he could slowly feel his heartbeat slowing down. Hot tears were starting to fill his eyes, and he felt so pathetic. He didn't want to be this weak in front of Adam, even if he had already seen the worst of him at their first meetings. He wanted to be strong, for him.

"Adam, I'm sorry." Kaz whispered in a low voice, that was almost cracking. He tried to swallow around the lump in his throat. Adam just pulled him closer and whispered soothing words in his ear.

"It's okay, Kaz. Everything is fine." Kaz was still sweating like crazy, but the shivers slowly died down. He took in a deep breath and wrapped his arms around Adam's chest, pulling him down and leaning back on the sofa, so Adam was sitting on his lap now.

They just sat like that for a while, quietly breathing as they held each other close. His headache wasn't gone yet, but he was feeling better now, with Adam in his arms. A few tears rolled down his face and Adam leaned back to look at him. Kaz noticed suddenly that he wasn't wearing his aviators, having just been in bed, and he felt weirdly exposed. He quickly rubbed a hand over his eyes.

"I must look pretty pathetic right now." Kaz said with a huff. And Adam just shook his head at that. When the blond boy leaned in, Kaz turned his face away, still embarrassed. "I just threw up, so..." he tried to explain. But Adam just shook his head at that, leaning in for a kiss.

"Smells more like peppermint to me." Adam said and brought their faces even closer lightly kissing Kaz's temple with his lips.

"I definitely don't deserve you, god, damn it." Kaz whispered with closed eyes, taking a few deep breaths. It seemed that Adam didn't know what to say to that, because he just buried his face in the crook of the others neck, wrapping his arms tighter around Kaz.

A few minutes went by and none of them said a word. Kaz's hands were still trembling, but he was feeling better, now that he was able to calm down. He took a look at the boy in his arms and saw that he had fallen asleep again. It was the middle of the night after all and Kaz felt a bit bad for waking Adam up at such a time.

Ignoring his still trembling hands, he locked his arms around Adam's waist, walked back to bed with him and laid him down very carefully as to not wake him up again. He couldn't help but smile at the sleeping boy on the sheets, and laid down next to him.

As bad as his withdrawals made him feel, Kaz just knows that this is all worth it. The shaking, the rapid breathing and the vomiting was all worth having Adam's warm body beside him when they both went to bed together. Kaz was determined to change for that boy, he owed him that for the things he did while he was drunk. And he had to do it for the last years he lost in his numbed state of mind. He knew if he ever felt like he couldn't do it, Adam would be there for him and Kaz wanted to be there for him too, if he ever needed to.

_I really don't deserve you._ were the last words that crossed Kaz's mind, before he finally managed to drift off, falling asleep at last.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading <3
> 
> Yet another little continuation for the Rich Kid AU, yay. This takes place a few weeks after the events of "Red Flower on his Cheek".  
> I'm sorry for not uploading anything in a while btw, but I've been sick for the last two weeks and couldn't get my brain to work OTL I wrote the last bit of this in a fever dream and let [tsudoku_library](http://archiveofourown.org/users/tsund0ku_library) edit this for me, so thanks yet again ;3
> 
> Tell me what you think in the comments or on tumblr ( [ilibra.tumblr.com](http://ilibra.tumblr.com) ) if you want :)


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